I once knew a man who refused to use twenty-dollar bills. He told me that he didn’t want to carry around Andrew Jacksons; he didn’t need him in his pocket. Whenever he came across one, he would rip off the bill’s top-middle part, removing Jackson’s scalp. I still use twenties. But, whenever I can, I replace Columbus with Arawak. I say: “I’m from Arawak, born and raised.”
It turns out that our city wouldn’t have its name were it not for a local tavern owner and his strange admiration for that lost explorer. This publican had invited the city’s naming committee to his place of business for some hospitality. And he must have been hospitable enough, because here we are in Columbus, Ohio.
